Welcome to the final episode! I'm not sure how I've felt about this season overall.... was it frustrating to listen to Chad for the first 6 weeks? Yes. Was it boring to watch Robby and Chase? Also yes. Do I care who wins at this point? I'm not really sure! But regardless, let's get this show on the road!

We dive right in to Jordan's meeting with Jojo's family. We are introduced to her parents and brother and a girl who I am not sure if it's Jojo's sister or sister-in-law, but I am sure that it is Kylie Jenner pre-lip injections.

Buy my lip kit?

Jordan hands out weird hats to everyone and then chats with the parents, who are both hard on him and wonder if Jojo can trust him. The problem with being so suave is that people may not see it as genuine. And it may not be! But if it is, it must be frustrating to never have people believe your intentions. I guess that's the price of pure, unadulterated man-beauty. Jojo's mom thinks the two of them are too much alike, but Jojo isn't interested in hearing that. 

Jordan doesn't specifically ask Jojo's dad if he can marry her, something he's been talking about doing all season, so I'm guessing that will either come back to haunt him or he will just call him up later in the episode to ask. 

The family date goes by fast and then we are instantly on to Robby's time. He arrives in the exact same open-air red Thai taxi, goes through the same chats with the parents (Jojo must have made the brothers stay on the sidelines this time, since they scared Ben so badly last season. Smart move.), but does one thing differently: he asks for Jojo's hand...in marriage. This brings everyone to tears. I just don't know about Robby. Jojo says that her favorite thing about him is "the way he makes me feel." But is that really something about Robby? Does he have any interesting personality traits, or ideas, or even a sense of humor? Not that we've seen! 

Adios Robby!

After Jojo bids Robby adieu and sends him back in his lil red taxi she goes to hear what her family thinks. They are all really into Robby, because he was more open with him feelings (some may argue TOO open), and wants to propose to her here, now! She freaks out and asks if Jordan asked for her hand, and they say no. And I believe that this, right here, is the reason she is now so torn. Crying, and even rolling her eyes at her mother. I guarantee if Jordan had asked, she would know exactly what to do, but now she is scared to risk choosing him and not getting that sweet, sweet Neil Lane bling. 

Reverting back to teenage "Joelle" when in her mother's presence

The next day Robby and Joelle/Jo/Jojo hang on the beach and Robby spins up a little tale of domesticity for her, describing their future life together. Something about bonus rooms and meatloaf and sav blanc, which isn't my ideal but perhaps its Jojos. She uses her moves that she learned on the yoga date (getting more use out of it than I would have thought!) and straddles Robby on the beach. 

Chase isn't going to be happy!

Later that night they go back to the hotel and talk more about their love. Robby gives her a bundle of pics (and we later learn that Jordan also has a bundle, so this was clearly not either of their actual ideas), and who knew all this time there was someone not only filming them but taking photos! The most interesting part of this date is the fact that Robby is still wearing the slippers he stole early on (I  refuse to believe these are new ones from the current hotel).

Jojo, someday our dog can fetch me these very slippers in the morning when he brings us the newspaper

Moving on to Jordan. Note that Jojo didn't run to him on the bridge, so I think she's a bit mad that he didn't ask her dad if he could propose. Or, as he constantly refers to it "get on a knee." Jordan, this isn't a football huddle. It's called proposing. Say the word or I don't believe that you are interested!! JoJordan set off on the high seas in a pirate ship and then take kayaks to a small beach where Jojo can grill him on why he didn't ask for her parents blessing. They continue to talk about this into the night and it's incredibly frustrating to watch because they seem to both be misunderstanding each other. Jojo is taking Jordan's saying "if" he proposes to mean he isn't sure if he wants to, when I'm pretty sure what he means is that he thinks SHE isn't sure if she's going to pick him. Essentially, he doesn't want to ask someone's dad for a blessing if he isn't going to be chosen, basically meaning that someday down the line when he meets another person he wants to marry, he will have to do it for a second time. I think that's respectable. I also like that Jojo could describe actual things about Jordan that she liked. They don't seem to come to an understanding, at all. 

What did I tell you?? Calling the parents

The men both pick out rings (I liked Jordan's better, personally, but they were both good), and they both write Jojo letters that cause her to sob uncontrollably, as she likes to do when she is dressed in formal wear and full make-up. Both men are VERRRRRRY confident that they are "winning." I am starting to feel for Robby. He is very into this. I will admit that it must have been easy for Jojo to enjoy feeling so loved by someone. I get that. But there's got to be more to it, and it has to go both ways! Up until Jordan wrote her that letter, she just wasn't sure that he would propose. Once she knew, her decision was made. 

The beach looked very hot and sweaty as she tells repeatedly tells Robby how much she wished it was him. I don't know if thats very comforting. They are both crying and sweaty. 

Well, that was disappointing

So, by process of elimination, Jordan is the winner! Jojo is excited and so is he. Both of their hands were shaking as they put the ring on, which I thought was cute. This is not surprising in any way, since we all saw it from week one, but now we know for sure. Best wishes to you two crazy kids! I have no idea if they will last but I guess they have just as much chance as any of the rest of us!! I will miss seeing Jordan's face every week, though. Definitely a Bachelorette highlight for me!! What did you guys think??

Off into the sunset